Better than you!
by NevErEndIngDreAmeR
Summary: A very odd fic...Sirius and James fight over who is better.Remus voted, Lily voted, and now, it's all up to our little rat. Includes crazy pillow fights and maniac characters. One-shot. Set in their 7th year. Please R


This is my first try for a one-shot so be nice. Anyway, this is set in their seventh year. Lily is already James' girlfriend and she knows about them being an animagus. Please take time to read. This is extremely crazy and I was just bored when I did this. Sorry for it.

Disclaimer: I don't own any characters here...

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"James, where are yoou?" cooed Sirius Black. With his shaggy black hair and gray eyes, he is simply irresistible. Every girl wants him, every guy wants to be him. Well, maybe except for his bestfriend, James Potter.

A boy with really dark brown hair (almost black) which was extremely ruffled, yawned and then stirred in his bed.

Sirius smirked then went over to James' bed then began to shake him awake.

"Geroff mum, I'm trying to get some shut eye." muttered James sleepily. He covered his whole body with his blanket then curled like a furball.

Sirius, to no avail, wasn't ready to give up.

"But Jamesie, quidditch practice is in two hours. You don't wanna be late do you?" asked Sirius sweetly. James groaned in his sleep. Still with eyes closed, he muttered something.

"Sirius, for your own safety, back off and leave me alone. It's a Saturday so no quidditch practice." said James.

Sirius didn't obey, and proceeded to plan C. He took the edge of James' bed then tipped it over. James groaned again but did not open his eyes.

"Sirius, come here and help me up, will you?" asked James and Sirius obeyed, walking towards James who was lying on the floor, still with the blanket.

As Sirius reached for his hand, James extended his hand but intentionally punched Sirius' eye. Sirius growled just like a dog and glared at the sleeping James.

"That will teach you not to mess with me while sleeping." Muttered James then resumed sleeping on the floor.

Sirius stammered and touched his eye. He decided to give up on waking James up but remembered to give his friend a little acknowledgement.

"Fine James, sleep all you want. It just proves that Sirius Black is greater than James Potter." he said then went towards the door.

At this words, for the first time, James' eyes opened and he stood up almost rapidly. He glared at Sirius.

"Did you just say that you're better than me?" asked James slowly. Sirius faced James then smiled.

"Why yes, any problem with that?" asked Sirius coyly. James began to steam in anger. He then jumped at Sirius then began to reach for his hair.

Sirius panicked then began screaming 'Not the hair! No! Not the hair!'

James still struggled, aiming for Sirius' oh-so-precious hair.

"Take back what you said and I shall prevail!" exclaimed James loudly. Sirius was torn between his hair and his dignity. But he decided that he wasn't giving up any.

"NEVER!" shouted Sirius and James took a pillow and began hitting Sirius with it. Sirius rolled and then also took a pillow. He went to the opposite side of James and they both stared at each other.

James grunted. Sirius snorted. Round one, FIGHT!

Sirius was the first to attack. He hit James head but with James quick chaser skills, he managed to dodge then bumped Sirius on the head.

"Take that! Hahaha! I will win this war!" said James then began to run around the room, Sirius hot on his tail.

But, with Sirius' excellent beater skills, he aimed at James and got him. James collided with the pillow and slipped. Sirius laughed.

"Now who's the king of the pillows?" asked Sirius then ran around the room like a maniac. James took his upside down bed and hid behind it, with pillows in hand.

"I will never give up my throne!" exclaimed James then threw a pillow at the running Sirius, but missed. Instead, it hit Remus Lupin who was just about to get up from his bed.

Remus groaned then rubbed his head.

"Guys, please stop acting like nine-year olds or take your battle for the throne of pillows downstairs." said Remus as he got up from his bed and began to fix it.

Sirius stopped running and looked at James.

"Well, you heard the man. We shall take this downstairs ye old geezer!" said Sirius with a Scottish accent then began to walk towards the door. As he held the doorknob, he felt a pillow hit his head. He growled like a dog again and turned to face James who was smirking.

James narrowed his eyes.

"I will stop fighting this useless battle if you admit I'm better than you!" exclaimed James then began throwing pillows again.

Remus sighed then proceeded to watch the two boys fight.

Sirius came towards James and looked as if he was about to say James was better than him. But then, he smirked and said in a very creepy voice.

"Over-my-dead-body!" he said then hit James' face directly with a pillow.

James pouted then went to find a new place to hide. He chose Remus' back. He ran to Remus' bed then hid behind him.

Sirius glared at James.

"Look, let's settle this once and for all. Remus, who is better, me, the handsome, sexy, perfect beater, woman's guy, smart, intelligent-

"Oh cut the chase Sirius, or me, the excellent chaser, top of transfiguration, champion of wizard's chess-

Sirius glared at James before turning to Remus.

"So Moony, who will it be, me, the great Sirius Black, or James Potter?" asked Sirius as he bounced up and down.

Remus looked at the two if his friends as if they were some kind of lunatics then got up from his bed, and began picking up pillows.

"It's really not fair for me to answer-

James glared at Remus.

"Just answer James, Moony. It's so obvious." He said in a matter-of-factly voice. Sirius turned to give James a death glare then also gave one to Remus.

"I swear, if you answer that stag, I will blackmail you. Remember the night when I saw you and Nicole inside that broom-." Began Sirius, but Remus chucked a pillow at Sirius before he could finish the sentence.

"Okay, okay. Just stop saying that. Sirius Black is better than James Potter." said Remus annoyed.

Sirius eyes brightened and he stuck a tongue out at James.

"See? I told you I'm better!" exclaimed Sirius then began prancing around the room. James just glared at Remus then pouted.

Suddenly, the door opened ajar and a very pretty girl with red hair and green eyes stood there, looking as if she was really tired. She looked around the room and saw Sirius, prancing around the room like a reindeer, Remus carrying at least a dozen pillows, and her boyfriend, James, sitting on the bed, pouting.

"What happened here?" asked Lily as she entered the room and eyed Sirius beadily.

Sirius smiled then went over to Lily and hugged her.

"Oh Lilykins, James and I were fighting over you, but in the end, Remus found out that James' love for you was only fake, so I won! You're now mine Lilykins!" exclaimed Sirius then proceeded to hug her again, but Lily backed away.

"Now Siri, I want Remus' explanation, since he's the most convenient one." Exclaimed Lily then laughed.

James face became sadder and he looked at Lily with puppy eyes.

"You mean you don't think your boyfriend is convenient enough?" asked James and he pretended to cry.

Lily shook her head then turned to Remus, who looked like a white balloon with all the pillows around him. Remus dropped them accidentally. He sighed.

"Well Lily, these two were fighting over who was better, and they proceeded to ask me. It was really childish, you should have been here." Said Remus then laughed when he remembered them and their pillow fight.

Suddenly, James' eyes brightened and he clambered out of bed and fell head first (Ouch), but he stood up again the walked over to Lily and gave her a peck on the cheek.

"You know Lils, Sirius has only gotten one vote. That means if you say I'm better, we'll have a tie!" exclaimed James then smirked at Sirius, who in turn glared at James.

Lily stared at James oddly before replying a perfect comeback.

"What makes you think I'd say you're better than Sirius? I mean, Sirius is undoubtedly more handsome, and more skilled at quidditch. He is definitely good at all subjects just like you, but he's definitely sexier." said Lily and then walked over to Sirius.

James took this seriously then frowned.

"This is not funny at all. I spent years trying to get your affection, and you destroy it. Fine Lily, go to Sirius and vote for him. Even make him your boyfriend, I don't care!" said James seriously then made a go for the door.

Lily almost laughed but stopped herself. She took James' hand who turned to look at her.

"I was joking James. Of course, I think you're better than him." Said Lily and James smiled then hugged Lily. Sirius pouted at this then sat on a bed.

"Great, now we're even. How are we supposed to know who's better?" asked Sirius bitterly. Lily let go of James then helped Remus pick up the pillows.

"Wait for Peter then..." said Lily.

At this, James and Sirius' eyes lit up and glared at each other.

"I'm sure to win, ye old crazy dog!" exclaimed James and he took the pillows from Lily then began throwing them at Sirius.

Sirius glared at James then took a blanket.

"You'll never beat me, you're just a lowly deer!" screamed Sirius then covered James with the blanket and tackled him.

Remus and Lily shook their heads.

"How dare you call me a deer! I'm a stag! A stag!" exclaimed James then tackled Sirius on the floor and covered him with a new blanket. Both of them looked like ghosts.

"Where are you? I'll get you! How dare you call me a stag?" shouted James then felt around for Sirius.

He hit a bed then stumbled and fell.

"Well, you called me a dog!" exclaimed Sirius. He felt around for James too but stumbled.

"Sirius, you are a dog!" said Remus and Lily together.

Suddenly, the door opened and in came Peter Pettigrew.

"What's happening, guys?" asked Peter at Remus and Lily.

James and Sirius heard his voice and this was a bad situation.

"Peter, tell him I'm better!"

"No! James is better than Sirius, Peter?

"You liar!"

"You liar too!"

"Peter, you always idolized me, didn't you?"

"Ha! Peter, I'll buy you that chocolate you wanted if you say I'm better."

"It was a lollipop not a chocolate!"

"Peter, I'll give you my broomstick servicing kit!"

"I'll date you if you vote me!"

"Ha! You're a gay!"

"Am not, right Peter?"

The two boys covered in blankets enveloped Peter and the only word he managed to get out was

"Help..."

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That's my first try for a one-shot, so sorry about that. Anyway, in here, it's already their seventh year, so James already has Lily for a girlfriend.

She also knows about Remus and them being animagus so, that's cleared.

Please R&R!


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